Sindhuu....

The meaning of the word Sindhu being water (or ocean).It is said that the word Hindu has been derived from it and hence Hindustan and India. None of this means anything to me. Sindhu simply means "Sindhuja Madapusi". A girl I met as a fresher in my first Job. I am glad that she was named sindhu though,knowing she represents India in some way..(Now thats what we call as STRECHING it a little bit)

You guys must be wondering why I chose her as the topic of my post today.I just had a chat with her. Having a chat with her is so refreshing.She is one breath of fresh air for me at least(I am STRAIGHT if thats what you are wondering).I don't think she would like the idea of me writing something about her though!This will have to remain my little secret :-) Hopefully I do justice to the person she is...

I met Sindhu in Hyderabad during my ELTP(Entry level Training program) days.I get Nostalgic whenever I think of the city "Hyderabad ". It is a great historical city.I simply love that city!!So much romance is in the air ...the lake view in the night..awesome!!! I am talking of the "VIEW" not its "STINK".For your own SAFETY you are ADVISED to be further away from the lake while enjoying the 'View' (or Tightly clip your nose if you are near the lake:))

Ok getting back to the topic..Let me give some background on who Sindhu is...

She is no different from any other lady on the street.Hmmmm... fair,short, slightly plump and somebody who is unkempt.She doesn't have time to deck up like a lady, but she is pretty decent to look at. But the minute you talk to her.You will know how different and unique she is.She is truly one of kind.She represents peace and calm to me. By peace I don't mean peace in the usual sense.She has peace within herselves which seems to emanate to others who talk to her..
OOhhh My GOd!! Even I can write such philosophical stuffs!! I didn't know if I was capable of that. Amazing!!!

Sindhu is a south Indian(Tamil Brahmin) coming from a very influential family .She tore down all my prejudices regarding Brahmins (like being selfish, self centered, ruthless people who would stoop to anything to get their things done even at the cost of hurting people:)) and also about being Rich. Being born in a middle class family and having seen the way rich kids get treated at school, I just never mingled with them.Rich people were certainly off my limits. Inspite of Sindhu being everything I abhorred, I could never stay away from her.

We were staying in two different apartments but within walking distance(one street away). I was staying with a Sindhi family along with another fresher.We had a small room for ourselves. Sindhu was staying with two other nice girls(Ms.X and Ms.Y) who were also fresher's . Thankfully they had a separate apartment (I could go and stay over whenever I felt like). We being lazy girls we never thought of cooking and eating..What were restaurants built for? Cooking was a grand affair.Once in a while we would make something as grand as Thaiyir sadam(curd rice) , upma or tea. Believe me it is ' TRULY ' difficult to make them :-) You need to have "exceptional " culinary skills to make that.Kidding:-) Actually we had better things to do than 'COOK'.We used to chat endlessly,Come to think of it over nothing. But it was fun:-)

Sindhu is an ardent admirer of Swami Vivekananda..I really don't know who he was ..I haven't read any of his books either.Inspite of she being his fan, she has never bored me with his puranams(history) either. But whoever he was he must have been good.I am telling this only because I know Sindhu and she is really good.

She is a pretty easy going kid.We had a great time in Hyderabad together.She is lazy like me ..one of the reasons why we are still friends.She loves Ice cream.She is little stupid and adamant too..she feels the urge to eat Ice-cream when she has wheezing.I mean when she is really sick!! How stupid can one be ??? Then what else.She wants to remain a spinster all her life.We could never get around to talking some sense to her.She still holds on to the same theory.Ironically she gets proposed left and right.( I wonder why men always end up proposing the "Forbidden Ones".Guess it is more exciting to play Devdas for a while :)). Jokes apart she is the most lovely lady I have met so far.

I came to know who she was when the training period was getting over(two months) .We were told that some of us would be posted to Bangalore and the rest had to stay back in Hyderabad. Since we all got recruited from Chennai , everybody had their eyes on Bangalore inlcuding me. Since it was much closer to our hometown.Some people were trying to butter up (maska marofy) the trainers to get posted in Bangalore.Some girls were lying that they were getting married and their "Would be's "were in Chennai.Some guys were making up stories of their parents being sick...total disgusting lot or you can see them as funny cartoon characters.Everybody has different take on it. I found them funny as well as disgusting :-)

One Sindhus roommate (Ms.X) wanted to go to Bangalore too.Her mom was sick and she needed to be near her hometown.She kept worrying over where she would be posted and would be often seen only talking and worrying about it.Sindhu had a wheezing problem because of Hyderabad's extreme climates.So we all felt that she needs to go Bangalore. I also wanted to go.It took more than 16 hrs to Bangalore and 10 hrs to my hometown.Don't know if there is much closer route,but it would anyway take about 20 hrs at least and man I have no pleasure in traveling for so many hours in a train alone:-)Ms.X's father kept reminding her to go tell the tutors about her ailing mother and hence try to get her posting to Bangalore.But Ms.X being forgetful did not do it.

The D'day came when we would be told where we would be posted.We kept all our fingers crossed.Funnily though we were asked to pick up LOT's :-) So none of the recommendation and buttering up was useful. I wanted to give a "High five" but nobody was in a mood :-) I got posted to Bangalore.Sindhu got Bangalore. I was happy .Unluckily Ms.X got Hyderabad. I was sad for her.Then Ms.X started crying.I had a shock of my life!! I have never seen anybody cry like that in all my life even in a death ceremony. I just couldn't take it.I wanted to laugh..I know 'Bad timing'. I am supposed to empathize with her ill fate.But I just couldn't do that...When one decides to get a job and you are told you might get posted anywhere and you agree on it.Then why all this DRAMA??? I was pissed off with her!! I hate people who try to get sympathy in this way.I believe in one philosophy" You got to do it if you have to do it" Anyway nobody was asking for my opinion and I got Bangalore what does it matter if Ms.X has a problem.So I kept quite.I tried telling her in my own way to stop making a fool of her selves before others.Most of them were laughing at her openly which I don't think was NICE either.Grrrr!!! By the way Ms.Y also got Hyderabad too , so Ms.X would at least have company. Ms.Y was pretty decent in my eyes. she took this in very calmly.

After all this 'hungama' the next day our tutors made another twist in this story by telling if anybody wants to exchange places they can do that. Among 30 of us,24 got Bangalore and 6 got Hyderabad which includes Ms.X and Ms.Y. Only two people wanted to stay in Hyderabad and unluckily they were BOYSss.And as the man to man bonding goes,they exchanged with their friends.Can't blame them. Some were trying to brain wash all the people from Andhra to stay back.Since we are not a very mingling gang(meant we kept to ourselves) , nobody offered to help us.Then madam Sindhu just decides to stay.I was amazed!! Which Idiot would do that knowing you are sick and who needs to get out of this place as soon as you can, but Sindhu would!!! Actually there was no need for that, Ms.X had got used to the idea that she had to stay back..and above all we hardly knew each other(2 months).Why this sacrifice? Well that is Sindhu...
She was not trying to impress anybody.It is just the way she is.Ms.X initially refused to take it and made all the necessary fuss but took it at the end.I was disgusted!!Sindhu never even let Ms.X thank her.And the Irony was that I had to be with Ms.X in Bangalore :-(

The day we left from Hyderabad ,Sindhu and Ms.Y had come to send us off. Ms.X was crying again.I couldn't stand it!! So refused to even go and console her( For those who dont know me I can be really mean when I choose to be).When she felt better, I talked to her but I made sure that she knew that I was not totally pleased with her. I am sure she would have got my message. I can be totally blunt if I want to :-)

Ironically today Ms.X is my 'Real' good friend.I know, Soundssss.. funny right??? Ms.X is a Kid who refuses to grow up.She had her own (stupid) reasons for the behaviour,which I am not ready to delve in NOW.I tease her even today over that episode.This is my way of getting back at her and making her face the Real world :-) I may be wrong in trying to play GOD or trying to play Moral police .I am not PerFeccttttt... either. But I Love her and I think that justifies it.May be not...GOd knows???

One thing I long for is that I wish I could have had more time to spend with Sindhu. She came to Bangalore to see us(me and Ms.X) after 2 long years. We had a good time. She seems to have become thin,that lazy dog cant even eat!! Ms.X had been to Chennai to see Sindhu off when she was flying to Canada.

Sindhu today is doing her M.S there. She tells me she has got friends from different races(White,Black, Chinese) and they are all nice people.NO sign of Shilpa Shetty's "Chicken curry" Racism there:-) I am happy for her.I wish her the Very best!!!

Another Valentinesss.. day

I have always wondered why people give so much importance to this day... Why Red roses, chocolates, Teddy bear (god knows which idiot thought of it first!!!) and Diamonds...Why???I still don't get it..Why do people think that women love to be wooed in this way...and why on a Valentines day..??? ....Ok..I have no say in this matter as I have never been in "So called" Love.. I am not much of a believer in the kind of love that is often seen..

I spent my valentines day with a bunch of girl friends . One of them actually wanted to spend it in a mall ,so that she can get in the festive spirit of "Valentine's day.."and feel less depressed. But we ended up holing in our old dreary HOSTEL.In fact one of them bought us chocolates to treat each other since none of us had "so called" BOY friendsss..I know what you are thinking....We are a desperate bunchh..YEsss ..we are..Thankfully none of them thought of roses to brighten our moods.. Night started of with the usual "My life Sucksssss!!!" talks, went on to Office life(from weirdos to cute ones). Then the topic changed as expected to "What is wrong with us..why aren't we taken..???" We consoled each other by telling the apple story(where the rotten ones get picked first and good ones remain on the top ..so they get picked last) . I did not like the apple story very much.....

Then there was this really funny incident that my friend narrated..where she was standing across the road...and a bunch of teenagers(13 -14 yrs) who were playing football on the other side of the road asked " 'Aunty' can you plzzz pass us the ball ???" and she did not understand who they was addressing and hence didn't bother to answer..Only on second thoughts did it register to her that they were actually addressing her. We seem to have progressed from being called as ' Akka(sister) to Aunty'.. We are in a phase where we find it slightly difficult to digest the FACT that we are ACTUALLY ...growing Old.Suddenly 33 seems to be the right age to marry ( There was a time when we thought people who reached 33 were really old though :-) Not Anymore...)

We kept asking "Where the hell are all these morons(our future husbands) holed up in?" . I suggested this great idea of beating up our husbands after our marriage for giving us all this stress and tension. Nobody seemed to like my Idea though:-( They felt that our Pooor ...husbands might also be going through the same stress that we go through...Whatever..I don't think men are capable of any emotions at all...I know I sound cynical. No the truth is I do believe they are very much emotional like us..except they are taught that they shouldn't be emotional .Emotions are supposed to be girly stuff and that doesnot seem to suit their manly image. I remember my cousin (age 10) who was bullied and ridiculed for crying ....while I was allowed to cry at the same age. Doesn't make any sense....

We departed with the hope that we will not be seeing each other again on the next valentines day at least. I recall that we said the same thing for the last three years...though :-) Pretty interesting Valentines day..isn't it??? Even I feel so..

Selfless Love.....

"If I love thee what is that to thee?" this is a Old saying..very old and very true. For if I,--I, who am writing this , love you, it is indeed nothing to you and should be nothing. You have actually no more to do with my emotions than the wind to the sea.The wind rouses me to exhilaration and excitation--the sea fills me with vague melancholy; but both wind and sea are unconscious of their effect upon my soul"
- copied from the Internet ,but liked the thoughts expressed

How many us are ready to love/respect a person who shows no interest in us or our well being ? Very Often the answer is a BIG "NO" followed by "You must be crazy to even suggest it" .

In an Engineers language, we are ready to treat others with respect and love only

if ((condition(1..n)==true) or (at least conditions(a smaller list) == true)) then
{

I will do so,..so.. and so in return

}
else
{

get lost I have better things in life to do than waste my precious time over you(I can conquer this world ,with the time I waste over making things right between us..just kidding:))

}
For the above "If construct"
Some conditions which could vary from {getting my my due respect and my space,get my award etc.. }
If condition true then I will {help you in work at home,office,or let u take the remote at home:)) }

We humans don't like to do any favours for anybody without having a ulterior motive behind it.It could be

1. recognition in the form of an award
2. love in return,
3. respect,
4. or just a look of appreciation(we thrive on Attention),
5. monetary benefit etc...the list is endless.

We think, even if I am in a position to help

"Why should I? "
"What do I get from doing this?"
"How is it going to help me? Will it bring me closer to my dream ,else why waste my energy on it?"
"Whats the whole point ?"

We are not ready to be good to others until it is reciprocated in some form.

It is quite difficult to fathom the meaning of selfless love and even more difficult to practice it in our daily life's.

For example

• Can I try not to get pissed off with that auto driver who is trying to make a quick buck by charging me double or triple of what he should be rightfully charging..??
• or when he refuses to budge an inch when it rains like crazy even though he has no potential customers in sight
• or say, that colleague who is trying to put you down in front of your co-workers/boss for no other reason than "getting visibility".
• or that guy who is honking like crazy in a traffic jam while trying to get ahead of you even though you know for sure that there is no way he is going to make it:)) Wonder if people realise that they are actually racing each other to reach their final destination -"their grave".Anyway who cares what I think , the thought was about not getting provoked in traffic jams.

Very often we are little more willing to forgive mistakes one in our family commits but not ready to budge an inch when it comes to forgiving trivial ones a stranger commits.

I think love begins with forgiving .

What I speak may seem so far fetched, and sound like a "impossible to attain" kinds.But as the saying goes "Nothing is impossible". If one works at it, one can... (Oops! I sound philosophical!).

OK..Got a bad habit of going on and on about a topic that's currently on my mind ,often not considering the infinite patience of my readers.So stopping my lecture here.Good day!